An interview with Dr. Mark Schuster, the author of Everything You Never Wanted Your Kids To Know About Sex (But Were Afraid They’d Ask)
By Valentina Cardenas, 17, Ramona Convent (Alhambra)
This interview contains frank information about teens and sex. After consulting with L.A. Youth’s teen staff and their friends at various schools, we prepared these questions to give teens the information they want to know, but might be afraid to ask. Our purpose is not to offend, but rather to help teens make informed decisions.
Dr. Mark Schuster, director of the UCLA/Rand Center for Adolescent Health Promotion, answered our questions about sex. His book for parents, “Everything You Never Wanted Your Kids To Know About Sex (But Were Afraid They’d Ask)” was published in 2003. This is part 6 of a 7 part series.
16. When does puberty usually start for a preteen and how do they know it has started, and what happens if it’s started earlier?
“Well, there’s a range of ages where it would typically start. For a girl, it will start from anywhere between 7 to 8 to age 13. But, it is really variable. When it first starts, she might not even know it. The first thing that most girls become aware of is that they begin to start the development of their breasts. It feels like a little pea near their nipple, or several little peas. That is often the first step. They’ll often menstruate within two years of that. Their bodies are already starting to go through changes before they’re even aware of it. If it’s early, then they should go to the doctor and get checked. Often there’s no explanation. But the doctor will often want to check and make sure there is nothing else to worry about. And for boys, it’s more like 9-14. If boys are early, it is more often a real issue, a medical issue, and the doctors have to check it rather quickly. You worry about there’s a tumor that is causing hormonal problems. I’m giving you the full age spectrum, I mean most boys don’t start that early.”
17. Has puberty been starting earlier?
“You know, it’s about two years earlier than it was 100 years ago. We don’t have any evidence that it just keeps dropping and dropping over the past 20 to 30 years. It’s been leveled for as long as we know. It could be all sorts of things, it could be better nutrition, environmental factors.”
18. What is the difference between a female and a male orgasm?
“Well, that’s something that is not as well known as you might think it might be. I would say that, male orgasm is usually signaled by ejaculation. It’s possible to have an orgasm without ejaculation, but usually there is ejaculation, it’s physical evidence. A woman’s orgasm may be more subtle, she may lubricate more, but she may not really be aware of that. One issue is that when a man and woman are having sex, the man usually has an orgasm. He and she are very conscious of him having an orgasm. Women don’t always wind up having orgasms, particularly if intercourse is not stimulating them in a way where it brings them to having an orgasm. Women sometimes need to tell the man that she wants to have an orgasm, then he needs to do other things to help her have an orgasm, and that can involve stimulating her clitoris with his hands, or with his tongue or whatever. Very few men have never had an orgasm, but some women get to middle age without having one. They have children, they’ve had sex with their spouses for years, but they’ve never really experienced an orgasm.”