By Claudia, Peer Health Educator
For so long I thought I had the best relationship with my ex-boyfriend. I used to think that getting insulted or getting asked to do things I didn’t want to was normal. It wasn’t. I began to be insecure of myself and I always felt like I had to accept my ex-boyfriend's actions. It took getting hurt repeatedly and moving to a new school to realize that I was in an unhealthy relationship.
All this pain made me close up so much and I put my guard up in my next relationship. When I started a new relationship with a new person, I hardly communicated and I would feel jealous all the time. Anytime he would make a mistake, I would make a huge deal of it. I just didn’t want to go through the same things over again. I realized a bit too late that I was pushing this guy away. When he finally decided to end the relationship, a relationship in which we were both hurting each other, I suffered. I thought, "How I could let my past get in the way of my happiness?"
In the end, we both decided to give it another try and work on it all. We worked on communicating more and on accepting each other’s flaws. I’m happy to say that this guy has turned into my best friend. He accepts me for me and respects me. He has not once pressured me to do what I don’t want or what I'm not ready for. I guess we sometimes need to realize that we can’t carry on with the pain of the past - we have to work through it and continue on.
As young adults, we need to learn to respect ourselves and love ourselves and never let someone else bring us down or pressure us to do things we aren’t ready for. If you ever need advice on whether or not you're in a healthy relationship, you can check out the TeenSource Relationships page. Check out this video created by one of my fellow peer educators for more tips on healthy relationships.